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Nancy Kamp's Diary of a Mad Web Lackey

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"Sworn to fight evil and people I don't like."

South Park, season eight

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Entries by Date and Title
(often the best part)




  • Freshen Up
  • Paperwork Blues
  • Etching in the Rain
  • House of Blood
  • Catching Up
  • Dead Again


  • So, uh ...
  • Backlog, Boston
  • Brighton Pavilion
  • Hotter than Pretty Much Anywhere
  • I Give Up
  • Olympic Fever
  • Time Flows, Memory Remains
  • En Garde
  • Writings of the World, Unite


  • We Hate You, Gary
  • Happy Groundhog Day!
  • Pterodactyl Pond Scum!
  • James Franco Cannot Marry My Daughter
  • Irony
  • Thunder Up
  • Dog Gas
  • September 11


  • Reboot
  • Falcon Eddie
  • And The Award Goes To
  • I, Hypocrite
  • Opening Night
  • Lost
  • Lost, the Answer
  • 'Nuff Said
  • We All Fall Down
  • By the Fatal Bear Bite of Saint Euphemia
  • Caryn Gets a Life
  • Waiting for an Oil Change


  • Dressing with Wolves
  • Less Paperwork
  • Hope
  • Deep Fraud: A Bernie Madoff Cookbook
  • Senegal Bound
  • Mine Golde Doth Escape Mee
  • Phone a Friend
  • Home Again
  • Oh, Santa
  • My Grand Tour
  • The Huge and Depressing Potholes on My Road
  • I Like Kate Gosselin


  • Keeping Up
  • Mistaken Identity
  • Happy St Patrick's Day!
  • China Thoughts
  • Body Counts
  • Tsk Tsk
  • Big Cat, Small Cat
  • Five Bears
  • Sausage Rules
  • Periodic Crashes
  • The Thunder Rolls
  • I Could Have Been a Contender on American Idol If Only Brain Dunkleman Were Still the Host


  • Ice, Ice, Baby
  • Warm and Cozy Kharma
  • Goodbye, My Friend
  • Round Up
  • Fame
  • Fingers of Fire
  • March Away
  • March Madness
  • Scumbag Alert
  • Pit Free At Last
  • Morally Corrupt and Twice as Funny
  • Dead Sea Scrolls
  • Dogs Ate My Couch
  • Is Paris Incarcerated?
  • Happy Juneteenth!
  • YouTube Me
  • The Idiot in the Dell™
  • I Am Not a Crook
  • Patience is Not One of Nancy's Virtues
  • Who Can Forget?
  • Phoning It In
  • Shop Till You Shouldn't
  • Hairball


  • Reprieved
  • Towel Day
  • Taxes Done!
  • Analyze That
  • Home is the Traveler
  • Ahhchooo!
  • Wah!
  • Why Can't I use "Buried Alive" as a Blog Title all Over Again?
  • We Won!
  • Good Riddance to Bad FrontPage
  • Publish or Perish
  • Dreamweaver Crimes
  • Whatever Can Go Wrong
  • Our Hearts Are Still Bleeding
  • Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day!
  • We Goofed!
  • Tsk
  • Spam Scam?


  • Bearly There
  • Word from Jakarta
  • Martin Luther King, Jr.
  • Geekliness
  • Lock Up
  • Known Comforts
  • Everything Counts
  • The Price of Free
  • Cook That!
  • Ice Cream Tears
  • Irish E-mail
  • Affiliate This
  • Teleseminars
  • March Madness
  • Life Caching
  • Choices
  • Serenity Now
  • Burned on the Brain
  • Blog Basics
  • Thoughtless Cretins
  • Thanks, Mom
  • May Day, Mayday or Pangalactic Gargleblaster, Stat!
  • Triumph Of The Treacle Side
  • I just wrote "December" here.  What does that tell you?
  • Customer Service
  • Out of Sync We Are
  • I Hate Malware
  • I Apologize
  • To Free or Not To Free
  • Seduced by Delusions of Competency or Why I Am Not the Grammar Police
  • 24 Hours Later  
  • Quoth the Mad Web Lackey
  • I Am the Etiquette Police
  • Out Damn Code
  • Link That! 
  • Code Choking
  • Meltdown
  • On Target
  • Outstanding Customer Service
  • Software Dream
  • Lock Out at the Post Office
  • Do the Right Thing
  • Big Apology
  • Sure Thing
  • The Worst, Worst, Worst
  • Arrrrghhhhhh
  • Gates of Swell
  • Taxes or Titles  
  • What is Gimpsy Smoking?


  • No Tai Chi for You
  • Rules of Engagement
  • Fiasco City
  • Blood on the Ice
  • Blame it on Varus
  • And The Scapegoat Is ...  
  • ASCII Directions 
  • New Motto
  • Moving Day
  • Who is Nancy?  What is She?
  • Nine Years
  • The Cheese Stands Alone
  • All Fed Up and No Place to Go
  • Dumbledores
  • Idiot's Delight
  • Well, Oh Yeah
  • Trunk Monkeys
  • Advertising Genius, I Think
  • FrontPage Really Sucks
  • Mega Problem
  • See Mystic River
  • Instructions R Not Us
  • We Must Be Nuts
  • Help is on the Way
  • Secrets and Lies
  • FTP This!
  • Repairing the Oversight
  • I Won!  I Won!
  • Our Petty Horror
  • Trickle Treat
  • Short Stuff
  • Panic in Prairie City
  • Phone Phreaks
  • Planning Ahead
  • All's Well
  • Grouse On
  • Meats and Other Food Groups
  • Normal Search


  • A Pox on All Their Houses
  • Back in the Saddle
  • Picking Them Off
  • Exploding Heads
  • Almost Groundhog Day
  • Time to Hang It Up
  • Pulling My Hair Out
  • Hart of Darkness
  • Fighting Fire Ants
  • Wishing Upon a Star
  • Calling a Cuddle
  • Lying Spam-Weasel
  • Prune Tequila Ice Cream
  • Dog Thoughts
  • Unconscious Tyrannosaurus Defacer
  • Goat Soap
  • Spam Me No More
  • Grump, Grump
  • Choking on Code
  • I Do NOT Have a Septic Tank
  • Slaves of New Dork
  • Neatness Counts
  • I May Already Be a Winner
  • Let's Twist Again
  • Stove Wars
  • Decorations
  • I'm with Busey
  • Party Hearty
  • The Spam Also Rises
  • Mighty Hunter, Mighty Fighter
  • Good Samaritans
  • Giant House cats
  • Damned If I Do
  • Summer Blahs
  • 28 Days Later
  • Lost Passport Woes
  • Lost Passport - Part Two
  • She's There!
  • Total Information Overload
  • Go Lance, Go
  • New Attitude
  • Mistake Proof Fence
  • White Oleander
  • Boomer Sooner
  • Uh, Oh
  • Blue Screen of Cat
  • Back to School Piercings
  • Homecoming Shirts
  • Fiasco
  • September 11
  • Where Has Nancy Been?
  • Fireworks
  • Brain Overload
  • Breakfast with Imelda
  • The Rewards of Virtue
  • Crushed and Mutilated
  • Saved by the Bounty Hunter
  • Nancy's Famous Neighbors
  • Giving a Little
  • The Easy Way
  • Holiday Diets
  • Skip This Paycheck


  • Spongy Spur-Galled Scut
  • Anointing by Guinea Pig
  • Tailectomy
  • Doughnuts and Feet
  • Good as Gold
  • We have a Dream
  • My Turn, My Turn
  • The Ice Age Cometh
  • Pizza Spinning
  • Aspirin and OJ
  • Copyright This
  • Chainsaw Cheers
  • Mandarin Fish
  • Banners Blazing
  • Snot on Legs
  • Ends and Odds
  • Dear Wayne
  • Going Digital Again
  • Choosing Up
  • Bunny Ears
  • Death Wish
  • Novocain
  • Point and Shoot
  • Black Panther
  • April 19th
  • Owner of Men's Necks
  • Scammed
  • Office Supplies
  • Flag Waving
  • Stop Screaming
  • Backache
  • Biz Cards
  • Browser Bowser
  • Combo Jumbo
  • Darn Nice Download
  • Out, Damn Frame
  • School's Out
  • Jet Lag
  • Fish Forever
  • Branding U
  • They Really Love Me
  • Bad Camera. Bad
  • Playing Catch Up
  • Woe, Woe, Whoa
  • Jesse Saves the Day
  • Going Ballistic
  • Perdition Looms
  • Heroes
  • International Spam
  • Martha Rules
  • Teddy Mania
  • Being Wari
  • Bloody Shoes
  • Déjà News
  • What Did Your Last One Die Of?
  • Out, Damn Spam
  • Trash Killers
  • Lightning Strikes
  • Our Evolution
  • Sisyphus
  • Wide Load
  • We Remember
  • My Trash, Your Treasures
  • Double Waterman
  • Nearly Naked
  • Migrating the Herd
  • Fax Spam
  • Insurance Policy
  • Bulging Monkeys
  • Marital Brain Damage
  • Château Central Oklahoma
  • Murdered in My Bed
  • Siege Mentality


  • I Begin the Diary
  • E-Mail Signatures & Spam
  • I Hate FrontPage
  • Domain Forwarding
  • Go Team
  • Delete and Die
  • Links within Pages
  • Too Much Content
  • Error Watch
  • Link Testing
  • Growing Pains
  • Be Careful What You Ask For
  • Still More Feedback
  • Consistency & Positioning
  • Praise and Pans (Feedback)
  • Frames and Fun
  • Link Madness
  • Ragweed Madness
  • Fonts and More Fonts

  • Oklahoma City: Time Warp Again
  • Mailing Lists
  • Marketing Changes
  • Personal Publishing
  • Uncommon Customer Service
  • Clipping Art
  • Creative Efficiency
  • Planning Ahead
  • Bandwidth Theft
  • Tuesday Rants 
  • 200 and Growing!
  • More Useless Coding
  • The Shame
  • Too Many Hats, Only One Head
  • Seek and Ye Shall Find
  • Loved Him, Hated Him
  • A Scream in the Night
  • The Big Green Blob
  • Winning the Logo Wars
  • Little Miss Sunshine
  • Serendipity?
  • Link Swapping
  • Big Day for Microsoft
  • SOHO Lament
  • Taking Stock
  • Digital Cameras
  • Networking
  • Cognitive Dementia
  • Mea Culpa
  • Falling Scree
  • Top Level?
  • Déjà Vu
  • Publicity
  • Gain is Gain
  • Teamwork Day
  • How Secure is Your Password?
  • Motivation Methods
  • Snow Day
  • I'm Baack
  • Office Party Woes
  • Keeping Up with the Canines

800+ pages


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What's this?




"Modern cyberspace is a deadly festering swamp, teeming with dangerous programs such as 'viruses,' 'worms, 'Trojan horses' and 'licensed Microsoft software.'"  Dave Barry

"The galaxy conspires against us. ... We are merely victims of its violent tendencies. ... Innocents must suffer. ... such is fate."  Jude Watson,  The Evil Experiment (Star Wars: Jedi Apprentice, Book 12)

"The computer is better than me at chess ... but I'm better at karate."  Shoe

"I'm inflexible except when I change my mind."  Nancy Kamp

"For reasons I cannot fathom, I am not the boss of the world."  Gilliann Roberts,  Claire and Present Danger

"This is tiring work, so roughly 35,000 times a day, I have to take a break to eat something or drink something or scratch something."  Dave Barry

"In England, a 'website' is known as a 'lorry.'"  Jon Stewart,  The Daily Show

"A computer once beat me at chess.  But it was no match for me at kick boxing."  Unknown

"I never travel without my diary.  One should always have something sensational to read."  Oscar Wilde

"At first, this idea sounds ridiculous.  But if you really think about it, you begin to realize that it makes no sense whatsoever."  Dave Barry

"Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with."  Unknown

"It's never easy."  Andromeda

"Know what I hate most?  Rhetorical questions."  Henry Camp

"All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power."  Ashleigh Brilliant  

"There are three kinds of people in the universe - those who can count and those who can't."  Andromeda

"There's nothing wrong with you that can't be fixed by a couple of stiff drinks and a monkey."  Norm

"Just give me a chance to prove myself."  Alberto Gonzales

"Well, this was a real good idea."  Armageddon

more quotations





rated greenlightwrite.com 3 bears rated greenlightwrite.com 3 bears rated greenlightwrite.com 3 bears

Since I'm pretty good with titles - if I do say so myself, I'm always on the lookout for another writer who shows no mercy in that department.  That's why I started reading Jill Churchill's mystery series that includes such delights as A Groom with a View and War and Peas

Think about it.  Wouldn't you rather read The House of the Seven Mables than The House of the Seven Gables Nancy

PS It looks like some of Churchill's books are out of print so I've used a generic Jill Churchill link below.


If a book you're looking for is out of print, click on any link to Amazon Books Home Page to find out if it is available as a used book.








Buffalo Hunt

click on the photos of the OKC seal buffalo to enlarge them

summer - fall 2004 Nature Conservancy's Spirit of the Buffalo public art project in OKC

complete list of buffalo
photos on this site

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Copyright© 1999-2013 by Nancy Kamp, dba greenlightWRITE.com and Grace-Light.com. All Rights Reserved. International and US Federal Copyright Laws protect all material on this website, which may not be reprinted in any form in any media or hosted on any website. This document confers no rights whatsoever to its reader / recipient. No rights in any copyrighted material, whether exclusive or non-exclusive, may be transferred in the absence of a written agreement that is the product of the parties' negotiations, fully approved by independent counsel retained by Nancy Kamp and formally executed with manual signatures by all parties to the agreement pursuant to the statutory requirements of Section 204(a) of the Federal Copyright Act of 1976. Furthermore, anyone caught using our trademarks or copyrighted text, images, or jewelry and craft designs without permission will be reported to their billing company, their hosting company and any other related companies for account closure. We will also follow up with a copyright infringement lawsuit in accordance with the The Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA).

Using the information on this site and linked to this site is done at your own risk. No promises or guarantees of any kind are intended or implied.

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