Sniffoff1

Jane Marie proudly presents

The Great Amelia Island Sniff Off
Part One Part Two

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Martha Bear® was explaining. "Airborne," she said to her grasshopper pal, "Jane Marie is very busy helping to plan the annual Amelia Island Sniff Off contest, so I just know her sister Nancy's arrival will be a wonderful surprise. And a welcome one too. Not only will they get to spend time together, but they will also be able to work on our websites, greenlightWRITE.com / GraciousJaneMarie.com, etc., from inside the very same room! What with Nancy in Oklahoma and Jane Marie here in Florida, communicating long distance on such a project can make for many a complication. This visit will do them both a world of good.

Martha wandered over to the screened-in veranda. “Besides all that, do you realize how honored we are to have been chosen as the locale for this year’s Sniff Off, Airborne? I’m certain-sure it has to do with the fact that Jane Marie’s lovely courtyard garden is the perfect setting for the rose growing contest. Do you think the baby pink rose I’ve entered is my best effort?"

Airborne left her shoulder to land on a long table that held clear glass jars and vases displaying the recently delivered contest entries. “Yes, a wise choice, indeed.”

Just then, Bird let out a loud squawk, announcing the arrival of guests.

“The contest begins in two hours,” Martha Bear® pointed out after checking the wall clock over the mantle on her way to the door. “The grounds should shortly begin filling with spectators as well as competitors, and this may be some of them now.”

Jane Marie reached the door first. Martha had been mistaken. This was not just any visitor. This was family. Nancy had arrived! Squeals of delight echoed throughout the manor as the sisters, who hadn’t seen one another for quite a spell, held tight together, embracing an extra long moment. Martha, the white bear with no eyes who sees with her heart held back to witness the exchanged affection, absently squashing Airborne in a loving choke hold inside her heavy bear arm. As the sisters wiped away tears of joy, the quilted ursine* stepped forward, ready to give and receive a bear hug from Nancy.

*Ursine = Bear. Martha Bear® likes to think of herself as an ursine because she uses Bear as her last name.

“Dear, dear Martha, it’s wonderful to see you!” Nancy said sincerely. “We’re all enjoying your photos on the website. I hope you like posing as our model, or should I say SpokesBear, because you’re so good at it."

“I’m pleased you approve of my pictures. Jane Marie is not only the photographer, but also the director and costume mistress, so we have her to thank.”

“Am I mistaken, Martha, or have you put on a few pounds?”

Blushing at the compliment, Martha exclaimed, “I’m most flattered you’ve noticed my extra tonnage. I do what needs to be done to keep my figure at it’s fullest,” the bear responded honestly, certain her statement of fact was not bragging.

“Do you just have the one suitcase?” Jane Marie asked, trying to appear calm, but nearly overwhelmed by her sister's visit.

“I like to travel light.”

“Please feel free to borrow anything you need,” Jane Marie offered. “Well now, you’ve had a long trip. Have a seat on the pew and rest while I finish preparing the trays of Snickerdoodles and Peanut Butter Pinwheels we’ll be serving during the rose competition. You'll want to try them. Oh, and have a glass of Martha’s own Beary Juice, too, plus her lemonade.”

“Don’t mind if we do. Thank you kindly,” said the pleasantly pacified bear with a wide-fanged smile.

“Nancy, I’m so pleased you were able to coordinate your schedule so you could be here. And just in time for the contest too,” said Jane Marie to her sister.

“That was Martha’s doing, Jane Marie. She wanted to make sure I didn’t miss it. I ...”

Nancy’s words ceased, Martha tilted her head for a better listen and Jane Marie stopped rustling the foil that had been covering the refreshments at the sound of a muffled pounding coming from inside Nancy’s suitcase.

“Whatever is that?” Martha asked.

“Oh no!” Nancy whispered, fearing the worst. She got up and crossed to the great foyer where her sturdy suitcase sat waiting. The pounding continued until she flipped the latches. As she begin to lift the lid, it was pulled from her hand by a force coming from inside, pushing the case wide open.

“Tah-dah! Surprise, surprise! It’s me, everybody. Bear With No Name!” The small fur-worn fellow stood before them, trampling flat Nancy’s once ironed shirts and shorts where he’d obviously made a comfy bed during his travels.

find out how Bear With No Name became Teddy O™ in
GraciousJane Marie, the newsletter for January 2003
A New Name for Bear With No Name

Knowing well the little bear's reputation for mischief and occasional mayhem, Jane Marie decided to face the little ursine boldly. “Yes, welcome to our home. We haven’t seen you for some time.”

"Thanks, I know I've been missed, " he said.

When Nancy glared at No Name, he simply grinned back at her, understanding she really wasn’t angry at all. Glaring, he was sure, was her way of pretending she was the boss. If it made her feel good about herself, he decided, he would pretend to be repentant.

“Sorry to show up unexpectedly, Nance, but hey, I hadn’t been down to the great state of Florida for a long time and thought it wouldn’t hurt any for me to lend my expertise as a contest judge. In case anyone has forgotten, I grow some mean dandelions in OKC.”

“Is that a fact?” questioned Airborne who also knew of the antics of this particular bear.

No Name recognized the hopper, “Well, if it isn’t old bug-boy himself? How’s it going, Hoppie?”

“The name is Airborne, if you don’t mind, and it’s going very well. At least it was,” said the grasshopper who had flown up to the slow moving fan blade that stirred the air.

“Hey, don’t get your wings in a wad,” No Name shot back. “Got anything good to eat, Jane Marie? That sugarless chewing gum in Nancy’s makeup bag freshens my bear breath, but it also gives me gas. Say, Nancy, you might want to air out your clothes, just in case.”

“Thanks. I’ll make note of that,” Nancy replied, shaking her head and pursing her lips at the furry troublemaker.

As everyone ate, Nancy and Jane Marie thanked No Name for volunteering as judge, but explained the Sniffoff judges had already been chosen. No Name seemed to understand, then cheerfully interrupted all conversation while exposing mouthfuls of his half-chewed cookies. Once he’d cleaned his plate and reached over and taken the last of Martha’s goodies from her plate, the smaller bear jumped down and wandered off.

“Better go after him, Martha Bear™,” Nancy told her. “There’s no sense letting him get into trouble if we can prevent it. We need to keep No Name busy. I think the little guy gets insecure if he’s not included. I thought I’d given him enough work to do back home. I even thought he’d like the run of the house without me hovering over him. And I really thought he’d like telling my children and husband, ‘his humans’ as he calls them, what to do.”

“Seems to me that he’d rather be with you than without you, Nancy.”

“Lucky me,” she smiled, honestly touched that No Name loved her so.

“You lookin’ for me, Cutie?” No Name called out from inside the spare room’s closet.

Martha Bear® ignored his forward greeting and entered the room to find the dresser drawers and armoire and closet doors were all flung wide. Spew and Mr. Buzzbee, the cats who comprised the Florida Feline Force, were hiding under the bed, close enough to see and hear the goings-on, but far enough away to stay out of the whirlwind path of their hairy guest.

“I’m just looking for the best place to prop my pads for the night,” No Name enlighten them.

Airborne looked confused.

“For the slower learners in the crowd, that means the best place to sleep.”

It was Airborne’s turn to ignore the remark as he watched No Name settle into the armoire on the antique quilts. “Yup. This will do just fine for me.”

“We’re pleased you’ll be comfortable.” Martha’s attention was drawn to the window at a movement from outside. “Oh my, oh my my! Our guests are arriving for the rose sniffing contest. It is to begin shortly. We could use your help, No Name.”

“See, I told you you’d need me!” he confirmed, hoping they sufficiently appreciated his valuable assistance.

“I’ll fetch a damp rag. We need the joggling board in the back of the garden, the cement cherub bench and the top of the courtyard wall wiped down one last time for those attending who may want to rest. If you could do that, it would be most useful.”

“Sure thing, Martha Bear®. I’ll have it done in a jiffy.”

“Not need to hurry any. Take your time. Oh please, oh please, take your time.”

With No Name gone, Jane Marie, Nancy and Martha were able to greet old friends and meet new ones. Animals and humans filled the flower garden in a grand hubbub of socializing. Sun umbrellas protected many of the ladies in their finest frocks as they and their partners trod the red and yellow serpentined brick path, which offered the best spots for observing the various species of flowers cultivated there.

“Everyone. Everyone, please,” Jane Marie called. As many as would fit crowded into the screened-in veranda with the overflow watching from beneath the shade of the lavender and white crepe myrtle trees. “If I might have your attention. I ...”

“I’m all done, Martha,” No Name hollered as he pushed and shoved his way from the back of the property through the assembly. “I thought you kept a better yard than this. I wiped down the top of the wall and just look how nasty this rag is. It’s plum filthy!” He held it high for the entire crowd to check out.

Jane Marie could see Martha’s humiliation and tried to make the best of the situation. “This is Bear With No Name, our visiting caretaker extraordinaire from Oklahoma City. Would everyone please make him welcome?”

Those gathered found their hands and reluctantly applauded despite the fact that this intruder had embarrassed their very best bear, Martha.

“Thank you. And now if our judges would please step forward as I call your names. Draggle Muzzlemount.”

A black dachshund took his place in front of the rose table, his tail jutting straight out with nary a wiggle for he took his position quite seriously.

“Hedda May Hopper, close friend of our own Airborne.” Airborne winked at his girlfriend as she flew to the edge of the table and balanced there.

“Lilly Smith, who resides in the houseboat on Egan’s Creek has kindly agreed to serve.” A young woman with a button nose and red hair curtsied in her blue gingham dress.

“Maggie O’Harkin makes the best pralines in town.” Maggie proudly came forward, pleased to be known for her confections.

“And finally, Mr. Wink E Bear of Teddy Cares Grocery.” Martha’s recent date to the Spring Sing doffed his ball cap in her direction, a motion not missed by No Name.

One by one, the judges picked up the numbered glass jars and vases that each held a single stem. The audience watched the faces of the adjudicators, looking for clues as to which roses were their favorites. They all nodded as Wink E Bear pulled out a magnifying glass and examined each blossom for uninvited pests. Finally, the judges handed their scorecards to Jane Marie and Nancy. The sisters began tallying the results while the spectators speculated on the judges’ choices.

To Be Continued

Our Bear Stories

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